Speaking of Being Wrong

I don’t know about you, but I quite enjoy being right.  I grew up with the tenacious (read ‘stubborn’) habit of arguing my way to the bitter end.  Needless to say, I wasn’t very popular.  But I was right!

It all started in school. I don’t think I was necessarily any smarter than my peers, but I was blessed with a great memory. For the most part, that resulted in a great amount of positive reinforcement.  I remember the feeling of praise as I correctly answered the teacher’s questions.  I also remember the collateral benefits of having such a talent.  My popularity received a boost as I traded insider answers for the affections of Wayne, the dreamiest kid in our grade 1 class.  He promised some hot and heavy hand-holding while I provided the homework answers.  The arrangement, and the relationship, lasted an entire day.  

Another man whose example has greatly influenced my need to be right is my dad.  He has a keen mind: very scientific and very logical.  In school, he excelled in subjects with one correct answer, like math and physics, and has worked as an auto and R.V. tech for many years.  When there is a problem, he finds the solution.

Even when a problem had multiple solutions, Dad’s critical thinking would drive him to find the best one.  He would always pursue the cheapest, easiest, most efficient route (even if that meant spending more money, time and resources than he saved.)  

I quickly learned that being right mattered most of all, not only in my problem-solving, but also in my thoughts, views, beliefs, and opinions about the world around me.  And why shouldn’t it?  In an uncertain world, it’s refreshing to meet someone who is sure of themselves and their values.  I’ve never met anyone who was wowed or wooed by a fickle person.  I vowed to be solid, to know myself and to be strong in my convictions.

While I was completely baffled about many important things in life, like what I wanted to be when I grew up, I was fairly certain about four things: I do not run; Jesus was merely an inspiring, yet fictional character in a really long book called the Bible; I would never work as a server or in a café; and I love Alberta beef.

Thank God for being wrong!  Fortunately for me, I inherited not only a spirit of scientific discovery from my father, but with it a curiosity that allowed me to test out different viewpoints.  I reasoned that as long as I was experimenting with my opinions and beliefs, I couldn’t be wrong.  After all, I hadn’t yet drawn my conclusion; I was experimenting!

This process began as I attended a series of personal development courses called the Excellence Series in Edmonton.  I was amazed what happened when I suspended my beliefs and simply pretended to be wrong.

One of the first things I discovered that I was very wrong about was my view on Christianity.  The husband of a friend of mine invited me to attend their small church plant in Edmonton.  As I mentioned, I am naturally curious, but I still cannot say why I agreed to the invitation; nothing about the way I viewed Christianity appealed to me.  But I went none-the-less, and had such a strong emotional reaction during the worship service that I decided to return the following Sunday.  Weeks turned into months, and I soon gave my life over to God, to the complete bewilderment of my closest friends and family.

This one step opened doors I had never thought possible.  I tackled my obesity with long-distance running (a miracle, I’m convinced).  I even became a vegetarian.  Don’t worry, I still love Alberta beef, though now I just love it from the side of the pasture, and not on my plate.  And about that serving job?  Yep, I now run a café in downtown Edmonton.  My pastors founded it as a means to remain relevant in the community.  Despite the utter lack of glamour this role entails, it’s been by far the most fulfilling job I’ve ever done.  The connections I make with people and the impact I have on their day-to-day lives is incredible.

I would have missed all of this had I decided to be ‘Right’ above all else.  Sometimes our views and opinions get to be so strong, we just refer to them as The Truth, never pausing to reflect on their current validity.  Unfortunately, that attitude can so often block us from taking hold of a whole new joy, opportunity or passion in life. This is why I highly advocate being wrong.  As for what I plan to do when I grow up, I’m still experimenting.